Tuesday, November 04, 2008
History in the Making
OK, so I admit I was skeptical. And I was one of them cynics who said it wouldn't happen, for so many reasons.
Well - I don't remember when I was so happy to be wrong!
Labels: Acculturation, Culture, Major Achievements, Making a Difference, Meta Bloggin', People, Wow
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
A Little Lunch For Thought (TM) #15
A recent study conducted by Harvard University found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study by the American Medical Association found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
This means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Kind of makes you proud to be an American. Or at least live here.
(Sent to me by Adriana - Thanks!!)
previous little lunch... ...next little lunch
Labels: Acculturation, Culture, Damn Technology, Joke, Little Lunch for Thought, Meta Bloggin', People, Profoundness
Sunday, May 18, 2008
A Little Lunch For Thought (TM) #13
I moved here over six years, and never had a visitor.
Sounds like an inmate in a high-security prison, I know.
Now, don't get me wrong - we've had quite a few guests in our house, but always from the groom's side. When I wanted to see my family - it was me who got on a plane and made the endless journey to the holy land, being rewarded with a jetlag and a growing sense of all-over-again detachment every time I boarded the plane back to the US.
Complaining?
Moi??
Well, yes.
There is a painful catch in visiting your homeland once a year, as everything seems to depend on that short visit. Family, friends, places - the smallest thing that goes wrong casts a dark shadow; incidents that could be laughed away over a cup of coffee the day after (if you had the luxury of meeting the people you love on a regular basis), get overblown, and - unless mended immediately - cause damage; if someone is having a bad day when you visit - you cannot always set another day to meet, so you either give it up or have a bad experience that gets burnt in the memoirs from that trip.
Also, when you visit, you are the one on vacation (allegedly). You are all excited and full of good will to see and meet and spend time and - - - and soon enough you realize that others do not necessarily share this goodwill, as they are not on vacation. They work, they have a headache, they need to take the car to the garage, they have their daily things to attend to, they may be in the midst of a crappy time at work or in life, or they just don't have the time and mental bandwidth for you. And although they kept chanting "when-are-you-coming-when-are-you-coming-when-are-you-coming-when-are-you-coming-when-are-you-coming" - they actually can't be bothered right now.
That is when frustration strikes.
Like, you broke your own routine, put aside your own activities in order to go visit at a time that's convenient for everyone, spent all that money, went through those endless lines in security and all, did all that traveling (24 hours door to door, if you really wanna know) - and whatever for?
Yup, it sucks.
Distance in mileage and time changes perspective, for better or worse. I now know which relationships will last even if we keep meeting only once in a while, and I am learning to accept that others were just not strong enough, maybe conditioned on time and availability. It's painful, and the sense of loss keeps accumulating with every relationship that switches to the past tense - especially since you do not really get a replacement. Y'see, it's not easy to be the new kid when you're over 40. Everyone is already set in their own lives and families and friends, and you are the one seeking new connections. Add to that not fully understanding the culture and the cryptic dance of "soooooooo nice to meet you let's do lunch sometime" (I admit - I still don't get it!) - and you are set for many, many disappointments. Even if you were a social butterfly with a ring of truly incredible friends back home, you are not guaranteed to replicate it when you immigrate. Far from it.
Did I mention it sucks?
And it takes several years to realize that you're trapped in this limbo: living here too many years to still belong in your homeland, and not yet feeling that you belong here. Actually, you start wondering if you ever will. The past year or two have generously provided me with some very cold showers to increase this sense of wonder.
It's a rude and painful awakening (allow me to cheerfully overuse the word sucks, yet again), but I guess it's part of growing up. Yet another lesson. I can only hope that I will find my niche here, even if right now it seems unlikely. Oh yes, some days, pessimism rocks!
Every visit back home used to throw me off track, emphasizing all the above again and again, and it gets harder to readjust every time I come back.
Until my mom passed away, exactly two years ago, I visited at least once a year, as she was not able to make the trip. But last year I decided that need to think of myself, for a change. I thus announced to my family that from now on, the sky is open both ways; amazingly enough, there are flights from Israel to the USA as well, and it's time for some reciprocation.
And so -
- - - - - - -- - - - - the first swallow is arriving tomorrow!!!
previous little lunch... ...next little lunch
Labels: Acculturation, Culture, Family, It's All About Me, Little Lunch for Thought, People, Venting
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
5.6
That's what they say the magnitude was.
Around 8pm this evening, we were walking the aisles in Safeway, looking for cool candy (ended up with lots, including 2 bags of body parts candy - I think we're gonna be very popular with the little costumed candy bandits tomorrow night).
There we were, hunting for fun sugary stuff, when The JohnnyB stopped in his tracks and started to look over and yonder, at directions that had clearly nothing to do with candy. I followed his eyes, looked up and saw the signs above the cashiers, swaying in the wind.
Only, there was no wind.
"It's shakin'", said the woman next to us, looking significantly concerned.
I, in my blessed oblivion, just gazed at her, totally clueless as for what it's all about. And yet, her wide open eyes made me very alert. I felt a cold hand gripping my heart, as everyone now stopped and just stood there, waiting. For what?
And then it hit me. Earthquake!
I wanted to rush and find a solid and safe place to stand under, I wanted to run outside, anywhere but next to heaps of candy and shelves and high ceilings and animated "Express Line - 15 items" signs...
...but everyone just kept standing still, as if it was a moment of silence. As if time froze. Why aren't they moving? Why isn't anyone going anywhere?? It was all so surreal!
And then it was over.
Everyone proceeded with their shopping, the signs started to slowly come to a halt, and I - I was a vision in different shades of white.
With shaken legs and melting knees, I followed The JohnnyB along the aisles, walking very close to him, chanting, "Why did we not go out? What were we supposed to do? When is the right time to run? Where should we have gone? Whom should I have followed? wh - - - ".
"Relax", said the man, "It was nothing".
5.6!! nothing? NOTHING??
On the way home, he gave me a thorough review on earthquakes, what to do if and when. "If you can get outside quickly, do it", he enlightened the uninitiated. "Otherwise, find a strong beam or a doorway to stand under".
"So, why not always just run outside, if that's the best thing?", I inquired, using my common sense.
"Because you may not have time. When it hits, it's going very quickly", he patiently explained.
"So why didn't we go out immediately when it started?", I wondered.
"'cause we waited to see if it's a big one", came the self-assured reply.
"But you said that when it hits, it's quick!!?!??!", I insisted.
"Well...", said The JohnnyB, looking at me with the patronizing disdain of he who experienced the Loma Prieta '89 earthquake, "you just know".
I remained quiet, taking the time to fully appreciate and absorb the highly educational value of that profound bit of information. I am so glad I asked.
In fact, The JohnnyB is quite surprised at me. Y'see, I grew up and lived in a city that had its share of being the ultimate target for terror attacks and exploding busses and cafes. (Some of you may have heard of it: Jerusalem). Several years later, we were the target for Saddam's Scad missiles and the US Patriots missiles that added to the damage and fear. You just got used to it and went on with your life. Some people here even insist that I could kill a man with my hands. And after all that, I get all freaked out by a little tiny itsy bitsy earthquake?
Well, yes, I do!
I'm going to bed now, and shall do my best to follow the helpful advice my concerned loving sister gave me over the phone: "be careful".
Labels: Acculturation, Nature, WTF?
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Dining With The Admiral
JimmyB (who is the brother of The JohnnyB), won the American Bar Association Award for Best Paper on Military Law, which he wrote on Jurisdiction Over War Crimes. It's a big thing, as only one such award is given each year, to one person. For that, JimmyB flew from the East Coast all the way over to The Golden City. (which some people tend to refer to as San Francisco).
Up we went to the city, to witness the ceremony with our own admiring eyes. Took us only 30 minutes of frantic driving around to finally find a parking garage that does not require you to withdraw all your life-savings for an hour of parking. We walked into the Marriott Hotel - and were immediately surrounded by lawyers. Tall lawyers and short lawyers; wide lawyers and skinny lawyers; sly lawyers and honest lawyers (well, there have to be some, eh?); smug lawyers and, hmm, OK, only smug lawyers. All men in dark suits, all women in high heels, and a lot of military lawyers in their fancy dress uniform.
And among al that crowd, The JohnnyB and yours truly. The JohnnyB nicely dressed with a tie, and myself dressed quite decently, and still feeling very colorful among all that seriousness.
Took forever to find our way to the Armed Forces room, where they had all the uniforms. We were introduced to the people with whom JimmyB spends his daily life and we've never met. Nice people, I have to say. Now, I really suck at the art of mingling (as in, standing around and carrying pointless small talk to which nobody cares to listen and the best response you can get is "oh-how-interesting"). So, I kept myself entertained by trying to figure out and compare the different uniform colors and various ranks, and countless colored strip-thingies and pins. I even had the epiphany of why they call 'navy blue' by that name...
Apparently, we could not sit down, as the big shot uniforms were standing up, but just as I was about to break this rule, as JimmyB claimed that ladies can sit down when they want to, and, well, I'm a lady (hey, isn't anybody out there watching Little Britain? SOMEONE?? PLEASE??? ...) - we were invited to sit down. It felt like musical chairs, everyone hovering above their chairs, and then sitting to attention.
It was quite interesting for me to see how things are done in the US military (well, in the JAG), and comparing it to my military days, years ago, back in my homeland.
There was a welcome speech, followed by a moment of silence dedicated to those who gave their lives and those who are at harm's way. I swear, it was less than 20 seconds! (I guess lawyers are more efficient at remembering...). Then came one embarrassing moment, when we were asked to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance. Now, I am not a US citizen yet (still procrastinating filling those forms!), and I have no idea what to do nor what to say. So I just followed everyone, stood there like an idiot, and eventually kinda put my hand on my heart. When in Rome...
The ceremony proceeded, with an introduction of the luncheon speaker (onion soup), opening speech (chicken leg with forbidden rice), main speech, and finally - the awards! (accompanied by cheese cake on which everyone nibbled secretly during the long ceremony. For the record, I have to say that my mom would have been proud of me, as I waited till the end before taking the first bite!).
Awards were explained, then speeched, then presented, then given, and eventually came the thank-you-I-am-so-humbled-ah-you-really-shouldn't-have-no-really speeches.
Then, it was Jimmy's turn. Before giving his own speech, he said, "I was taught to keep it short or funny". Thankfully, he chose keeping it short. In fact, just before handing the award to JimmyB, the admiral also exclaimed "...and I would like to thank JimmyB's brother, John, and his sister-in-law, Naiva, who came as guests." Would have been nice to have my name pronounced the right way, for a change, but - hey, a girl can only ask for so much, eh? For the sake of JimmyB, I chose to not correct the mighty admiral in public (and those who know me will know I would have had no problem doing so!), and so, Naiva just smiled graciously and continued to take the video, using the loyal services of LumiB. At least I snuck some good shots of the admiral, who has a great face for painting. Revenge is best served cold and in watercolors...
JimmyB's 10 minutes of fame were followed by the main speaker, who admitted not being funny, and promised he would try to keep it short, too.
Well, he may have tried.
But he sure failed.
Miserably.
I was dead tired, but I kept my eyes open (unlike the judge who was sitting next to the JohnnyB, enjoying a very enviable nap). He told a tale of Philippines who were executed during the Philippine insurrection, and it was considered murder. Or not. Or maybe yes. Or not necessarily. Ask The JohnnyB - he actually followed the whole thing! As the esteemed judge finished his (short...) talk, we had an opportunity to witness an impressive amount of jerkiness. Some idiot (sorry, a highly distinguished idiot who actually goes by [first name] [last name] III) kept pondering and questioning on why the judge did not distribute his bibliography, and that it would be very important to have it, and on and on, just to put the judge down. The judge explained he has it in his briefcase, and he will be more than happy to give it to anyone who wants it, but Mr. Jerk III kept going and going - - - it was like watching Law & Order, with a uniquely nasty character in it. It was fun!
Eventually, it was over. As a compensation for the over-lawyerly ambience, we went to the SF Museum of Modern Art, and enjoyed an exhibition of Matisse, that shows his paintings as well as his sculptures (aha! you didn't know he sculpted, did you!?). It was fascinating to see that the master, too, worked in a series with some of this sculptures (OK, a 23-year series...), and how he went from realism to abstract. We strolled through the museum to see other painting and photography shows (with me wallowing in shame due to the loud comments by JimmyB and The JohnnyB). For dessert, we visited my all-time favorite piece of (hmm, art): The 3 white canvases... yes, that masterpiece is still there (only in a somewhat different layout!).
It now has a runner-up: "Indigo Blue". An installation composed of a huge (Huge!!!) pile of blue jeans in the middle of a HUGE room. And - the best part: a wooden table and stool where an attendant sits and erases text from a book titled "International Law Situations", published by the Naval War College Law Situations. An excerpt: "The attendant moistens an eraser with saliva, rubs out lines of text, and allows the eraser filings to accumulate into a pile at the book’s edge. Hamilton has described this activity as a way of 'using the body to re-mark history—taking the mechanically reproduced text and replacing it with the mark of the body.'" You can read more about it here.
I thought it would be highly delightful if JimmyB (who was looking very impressive in his formal US Navy uniform) approached the attendant and told her she cannot desecrate the book as such. In fact, I stated his whole bunch of lawyers, plus the admiral, should go to that exhibit and talk to the attendant.
But hey, that's just me.
Anyway, it was a good day out, away from the annoying mess that was sitting on my mind during this week.
Nothing like a day out, an art show and 3 Beard Papa's fresh cream puffs to revive the soul.
Labels: Acculturation, Art, People
